What a beautiful thing marriage is.  For me, it’s a covenant between you and God first, then you and your spouse.  I find it more meaningful when I look at marriage this way.  It means that I have made a commitment/covenant to God Almighty first and then to my wife.  It makes it more real and strong and that I don’t take my marriage lightly like Hollywood does.

When I got married my Pastor told us “You will both fall in and out of love a thousand times.  But, love is a commitment to each other, not just a feeling.”  That is so true and has really helped me think about how this is relevant to me.  My parents have both been married and divorced several times.  That has been a bad track record for me to look at.  But, I have resolved to break the cycle and that starts with me.  On the other hand, my wife’s parents are still married and they are working on 40 years(which is a great thing!)

Marriage isn’t easy by any means.  It is just like a job in theory.  When you go to work, you learn, spend long hours, work hard and expect results.  The same can be said for marriage.  It doesn’t drive in auto-pilot, it takes work, just like the job you go to. 

Being married for 9+ years now, I have been grateful to love my wifey and spend the time and enjoy the life we share.  I look forward to many more years in the future.  Looking up to other married couples that have been married for 20, 30, 40 years + gives me hope and makes me smile.  I know that being married that long doesn’t happen by auto-pilot, but by hard work.

Make a date night with you and your wifey or hubby and enjoy the time with each other, it will be well worth it.



6 Comments to “marriage”

  1. You don’t sound convincing. Your marriage sounds like drudgery, and you seem to have lost the feeling. Claiming that “love is not a feeling” is sad. Of course it is a feeling. I am sorry the feeling is gone for you.

    John Bryan Stone


  3. No, marriage is not easy…we’re married to, and are ourselves, a bunch of broken and sinful people. Marriage is one of the best relationships within which we can understand Christ’s love, sacrifice, and redemption. We sometimes hurt each other, we sometimes misunderstand each other. But with His grace and mercy, we can learn to give and receive forgiveness, restore our relationship, and choose to continue to love each other. Anyone who seriously insists that marriage is, or should be, anything different, is either not married, or living in denial. Scripture is very clear that love is not a feeling. Love is a decision to act. When done in sincerity, thankfully, it usually produces an enjoyable feeling…

    Maintaining a good marriage is hard work…making a good marriage great requires even more hard work…but anything worth having usually requires sacrifice and hard work…If it were easy, we wouldn’t have such high divorce rates…

    Wendy, wife of 9 years (next week) to a fellow broken sinner, journeying together through the strength of Christ…

  4. Unfortunately most of my Christian Ministry at one time was Biblical marriage counseling , unfortunate cause it was depressing to hear about broken homes for me, cause so many people complained about their marriage..

    I also studied why many marriages fail.. their were the secular answers.. such as dispute over money, control, lust and adultery..

    and there were the other evident basic reasons.. personal laziness, unrealistic expectation of what marriage entails, will bring too..

    do also note this plus outsiders do break up marriages..

    70 percent of evangelical pastors even counsel divorce, or have committed adultery cause they clearly are still sex maniocs..

    and also politicians, lawyers help to break up marriages too..

    but so do jealous friends, neighbours, realtives, mothers, mother in-laws now too..

    then there were the marriages made outside of the will of God.. where the persons chose his own spouse and not God’s or a Christian married an unbeliever and most of these marriages seem to fail too..

    The dircoe rate for professing chtistian belivers at 30 percent is even oine divorce too many too.

  5. There is a difference between complaining and being honest about one’s struggles. The key in regards to marriage is what one chooses to do about it. Do they just check out and allow things to spiral out of control? Or do they, through the power and love of Christ, choose to work hard to make things better and bridge the gaps?

    Good marriages are maintained, both by setting up a fence to guard from outside factors (other people, temptations, media, culture, etc), and by cultivating the garden within. For a long time, my husband and I focused on the former–guarding from outside forces. We maintained strict boundaries regarding friendships with the opposite sex, time spent without the other, and the like.

    While our marriage continued this way for years, and we stayed together, we were both incredibly lonely, bitter, and misunderstood and our relationship was very sterile. It wasn’t until we both decided to wake up, seek wise and biblical guidance, and WORK at tending the garden that is our marriage. It is not always easy, but it is worth the effort.

    We now counsel other married couples through a marriage ministry at our church. When we have seen growth, it has been when both are willing to set aside their rights, seek Christ, and work together to make it better.

    Christ, in His infinite power and sovereignty, can redeem ANYTHING.

  6. it’s so hard to read this now and find that I’m divorced from this person.

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